Change

**grabe ilang oras bago ko naisip to..haha
pero nakahanap na din ako ng site na kung saan ay pwede kong ilabas ang sama ng aking loob..
so anyway may ikekwento lang ako tungkol sa FIRST EPIC FAILURE ng buhay ko.


nagumpisa to two weeks ago.(?)
halos araw-araw kami nagaaway.
dahil i met some new girl friends and sometimes going out with them.
i said to her that there's nothing personal and im not gonna replace her or anything pero di sya naniniwala.

tapos Monday, Dec. 14 may lakad ako with that other group.
and i didn't tell even her agad! (how stupid of me. :|)
and bigla syang nagyaya to go out. ang sabi ko may lakad ako. (patay!)
ang sabi nya "and with whom?"
sabi ko *"with those guys"
tapos nun nagaway nanaman kame.
and ended up semi-off (meron bang ganun??)

Tuesday, Dec. 15, di ko alam ang gagawin ko
nagising ako sa ginawa ko and i was so guilty for what i did.

and then nung uwian na pagkatapos ng show she was crying.
for some reason*.
that night I texted her and slowly apologized.

until the next day Dec. 16, she was still mad at me.
And the president our company wants to talk to us.
sya ung naging mali sa mga nangyari pero di ko alam ako din pala yung tatamaan.

At kinabukasan tinatanggap nya na ako ule.
i was so happy!!
and then that night there was a leaked info about us. THAT WAS NOT TRUE. O.o

Dec. 18
she decided to break up with me.
i was like O.o
at first it was like the old times seeing each other, etc.
and then that night after the show..tears fell..damn..ang hirap pala!
tinanong ko sya kung pwede pa ba kame.
the hardest part. NO
that day she really broke my heart.

the next day was our day..supposedly. :(
i was so wasted didnt know what to do.
ang sabi ko sa kanya kausapin nya ako
tinanong ko kung bkit di na pwede kme.
she told me why*.
I still didnt believe her.
she told me to change my ways and become a better person.
at first i refused..but then again..i started thinking again.

I WAS AFRAID TO LOSE HER BUT I DIDNT SHOW ANY ACT OF IT.
AND NOW SHES GONE AND I DONT KNOW WHERE TO START WITHOUT HER
BUT SHE IS WILLING TO HELP ME OUT TO CHANGE. IM HAPPY FOR THAT.
ITS BETTER THAN NOTHING.

tatlong araw na din simula nung mawala siya sa akin.

ang sabi niya we can stay as friends daw.
pero ang hirap talaga..totoo nga ang sinasabi nila..
DI MO MALALAMAN ANG HALAGA NG KUNG ANONG MERON KA HANGGA'T DI ITO NAWAWALA SAYO.

right now..im slowly starting to heal.
"I WILL CHANGE MY WAYS!"
and this is the first step to make things better.**



*di ko na sasabihin kung sino at baket.
**pasensya na at masyadong mahaba..medyo emo kasi ako ngayon. :d